My Coming Out of the Closet
I have always known that I was different than others around me. I have always had this intense knowing of things without ever understanding how I knew it. I would have a conversation with a stranger and instinctively know what was weighing the heaviest on their heart or those they spoke of. I thought I was just really good at reading people and situations, that everyone could do it, but I guess there was more to it than that. What I didn't realize then, which I am all too familiar with now, is that I am extremely intuitive. Specifically in regards to claircognizance (clear knowing) and clairvoyance (clear seeing).
I've always known things without ever being told or reading about it. Let me tell you, my husband looooves this ability... well, not really. Makes winning arguments a lot more challenging.
So I am coming out of the closet... Spiritually speaking.
Interestingly enough the meaning of the name Jessica coincides with my intuitive experiences. It is a Hebrew name and the meaning is: "Rich; God beholds; wealthy; foresight". So in other words it translates into "to see before God, being able to see the potential in the future". And being as I have only ever been in love with two men in my life, and ironically, both are Jewish, my husband and I had quite the laugh with this bit of irony.
It wasn't until I entered the corporate world, running a global I.T department that my calling slowly began to take form. I had the pleasure of reporting up to some pretty incredible leadership who always encouraged me to take action and do what I felt is best. This freedom and honestly, rare leadership style (you know who you are) allowed me to really tap into my inner 'knowing'. Before long, I began to notice that I frequently had answers to things in areas outside of my expertise or general knowledge. I had no idea as to how I knew it, I just had this incredible sense of inner knowing that I couldn't explain and as a result, my career took off.
Not aware of it then, it was my intuition that I had been taping into for answers - and in powerful ways. I literally began to predict events before they happened. My team often laughed at the accuracy. I found myself knowing solutions to complex system workflows outside of my department and was often requested to attend meetings outside of my area of expertise. Though I enjoyed my time and experiences with such a respectable team and company, I couldn't shake that nagging feeling that there had to be a reason to this all. Feelings like this force you to look deep within and ask yourself the real tough soul-searching questions.
"What was going on?"
Life doesn't happen to you,
it happens for you.
Fast forward 4 very successful years and promotions later.
(To keep a long story short) My husband is a firefighter and was seriously injured while on the job. An injury that resulted in a year's worth of recovery and required three surgeries to 'repair'. Needless to say, I was greatly needed at home to care for my husband and young child. My husband couldn't even carry our son for the better portion of a year and as of today, continues to experience limitations and has to be creative about doing so.
As awful as it was to close the curtains on my I.T. career; in the end, I couldn't be more grateful for all that I experienced. All that my family and I went through. We were forced to truly look within ourselves and make the most of a very difficult situation. And that's what we did. See, life doesn't happen to you, it happens for you. Growth doesn't happen from a place of comfort, it comes from the struggles we experience. You have to decide if you're going to be a victim or are you going to thrive? We chose to thrive. I went back to school, picked up some pretty legit modalities, awoken spiritually, and really began owning my intuition.
Oh yeah, I joined Merakilous as their new Manager of Technology and Operations. Say whaaaa? Yep, absolutely terrified and incredibly excited for this new journey.
Because you matter.